"The Muffled Cries For Help From a Daddy of Four Beautiful Little Girls"


Monday, November 26, 2007

Time Traveling Hygiene Products?

I'm such a science fiction buff. But not in a nerdy way, I tell myself. Myself chooses to believe this.

There are some really huge science-y subjects that impact our lives. Some are almost theological.

Like, is it possible to travel back in time and alter the future? If so, it would be so awesome to travel back in time and plant objects in just the right place to be used who-knows-when in the future.

For example, that time I needed a pen to fill out an ATM deposit envelope...totally would have saved me a trip inside the bank if tomorrow-me had had the forsight to travel back in time to put a pen in my car yesterday so it would be here for today-me.

Or if tomorrow-me could travel back in time to have purchased milk at the store so today-me wouldn't have to.

Stuff like that. Many people would look at the pen-lessness of my car or the milk-lessness of my fridge and fail to see the science-fiction/physics/multi-dimensional aspects with which those scenarious are clearly dripping.

Thanks to a momentary rip in the fabric of the universe, I was able to get a quick peek at just such an incidence in which I think time-travel must have occured.

While Thanksgiving-ing at my parents, my wife determined that she was in need of certain products...on a day when many stores are CLOSED (more importantly on a day when I'm not planning on leaving the couch much less the house).

Fortunately, before I returned from the back room with a tube sock and a belt to tide my wife over, my mother happily announced that someone had left some of the badly-needed product in the past (or from the future? hmmmm) and it was under the sink.

So whichever sister-in-law-of-the-future had returned to save Thanksgiving, my wife and I thank you.

And I returned the favor. If one of you in the future has need of a tube sock, it's now been left there in the past.
You're very welcome...or you will be.

9 comments:

javamamma said...

Brilliant stuff.

Cindy said...

You're deadmeat.

Scott said...

By "deadmeat," I think Cindy means "brilliant" but didn't want to just copy what javamamma said.
I can respect that.
I think she's "deadmeat" too.
xoxo

Becky K. said...

When you figure out the past/future thing give me a holler. I could have used it in my photo debacle!
Laughing...but agreeing with Cindy that you should be "deadmeat" after that one. You owe her!
lol
Becky K.

Robotface Shumway (Big Doofus) said...

Go back to August 31st of this year. Pay whatever it costs to get a same-day round trip ticket to Vegas and put down everything you have on Appalachian State beating Michigan AT MICHIGAN. They you can buy all the "tube socks" money can buy.

Emily said...

Uh, I'd consider my man deadmeat if the topic of hygiene products and tube socks ever merged.

Anonymous said...

Scott,
You are a very, very bad man..... I haven't come up with the consequences yet that Cindy must impose upon one who discusses such taboo subjects in eternal bloggyinternetland, but I'm working on it. Let's see, with 5 women in your house, I'm sure that even God, Himself, is working on your consequences. How many middle of the night trips to Wal-Mart do you expect to make for such items? How many varieties will you choose before you select the correct one? ;-)
Jill

Mr. E said...

That was so wrong but so funny! You need to read my blog about my son and a dime stuck up his nose! Finally I get to blog about something funny!

Miss Paula said...

You know you're old when you remember "the belt"!! Too funny!!