"The Muffled Cries For Help From a Daddy of Four Beautiful Little Girls"

Tuesday, January 22, 2008

An Athlete I am Not

'Round about second grade it was determined that I needed glasses.

Had that been determined two years earlier, I might have realized that it WAS possible to see footballs tossed at me, baseballs coming at my head and other such niceties that make playing sports a tad more safe.

As it turned out, by the time I got my glasses (AND their fancy schmancy Fred Flintsone glasses case), I had already developed an apoplectic fear of any sport that involved having to see things in order to remain alive.

Of course, I had little choice but to become a "mathlete." Have I mentioned that before here? I actually went to local and regional competitions and figured out math problems...by choice. On weekends. When cartoons and other cool shows were on. How in the world I didn't spend my junior high years face down in a swirling toilet is beyond me, but God is a god of grace.
I got over my fear of sports with balls and became a jock eventually...I joined a bowling league.

[Pause for the pity to set in.]

Again, there must have been a huge spiritual hedge of protection around me because not once did I ever receive a wedgie based solely on the fact that I spent every Saturday at the bowling alley. I even went to a bowling tournament where I think there were famous professional bowlers, like the ones on tv. Trident or Dentyne must have sponsored it because I came home with a TON of gum...proportional to the amount of coolness I sacrificed by going there in the first place.

All that is to demonstrate beyond any shadow of a doubt that I am not responsible for my daughters' athletic abilities.

As I was watching my girls last night at their basketball practice, I was so stinkin' proud of them. They are not afraid of the ball, and they are not afraid of the pressure of all those adults watching as they try out new skills and drills.

I thank God (seriously) that there are many ways in which my children are different from me. God is good, and he has filled in a lot of gaps for me as a father.

I also thank God that are many ways in which my children HAVE inherited certain traits, abilities, interests, and especially a faith.

God knows just what each of them needs in order to develop into what he has called them to be. They've already passed me in athletic skill, and from the looks of it, they are each likely to pass me in effectiveness in His kingdom. They are going to be doing some pretty awesome things in the lives of so many people. You just wait and see.

I'm sure I'll keep you posted.


Kathleen Marie said...

Like you I have little athletic ability, my dear hubby was a farm boy so never had the opportunity and #2 son is a "preppy super jock"...football, basketball, etc... I just don't get it at all?

I also don't get #1 son who is an actor. I would throw up if I had to be on a stage.

Life is strange. The genetics must have skipped a few generations.

Enjoyed your story... Have a God filled day!

David said...

I'm with you on the non-athlete thing!

javamamma said...

What, bowling's not a sport? Sheesh, I always thought I was so athletic.

I'm extremely excited to watch my kids in their adventure of life. Sports, academics (or is that geekiness?), preachin', the miraculous or whatever. I'm pumped about God's future for them!

Big Doofus said...

I had issues with sports as a kid, too. I've been really excited to see my 14-year-old participate in basketball, football, soccer and baseball. He's actually a very good infielder and I cannot help but to glow a little when I see him make a great play at 2nd base.

So, if you didn't get wedgies and swirlies for doing math and bowling, what other reasons did they come up with to give you wedgies and swirlies?

Cindy said...

You are the perfect daddy to our girls. Even if you are a mathlete.

Stacy said...

Wow. And I always thought your profile picture looked so coachy. Really. Could have fooled me. :)

Now. I just want to mention that I think you should utilize that Mathlete ability of yours to determine just how much you can afford to splurge on your wife's redecorating pursuits for your anniversary.



Tyna said...

Yup, I get it...neither Hubs or I are sport oriented at all. I do like to occasionally watch figure skating, but the skimpy costumes un-nerve me. My kids are too young to know if they have athletic skills yet, but if they do, it's sooooo not my fault!!