"The Muffled Cries For Help From a Daddy of Four Beautiful Little Girls"

Friday, March 28, 2008

Giveaway--The Cluttered Wheel Of misFortune

My previous post--in which I publicly committed to cleaning my office--resulted in some very good advice and guilt-laden encouragement.

Let me just say for clarification: My office is clean; there is just a lot of stuff in it.

Clean stuff.

Both square feet of visible carpet get vacuumed regularly, and occasionally, there is a hint of desktop that is seen and able to be wiped or waxed or whatever you do to enhance the luster of such fine woodwork.

So please don't think I'm dirty, just messy. I'm sure you understand the difference.

My therapist has acknowledged that getting rid of some of the clutter could be difficult for me emotinally. As a minister who works with children a lot, I often find myself called uppon at the last minute to teach a lesson, or simply engage their little minds for X number of minutes.

It's not uncommon for me to have 3 minutes notice to be ready to step in and teach, and in those instances it's very helpful to have odd things sitting around my office. I just grab a bottle of vinegar--or anything else from that list--and head off to class. On the walk there, I just have to think of some object lesson or spiritual signicance involving that object.

So, as I prepare to clean my office next week, please know that the children of this church may be faced with object lessons using only paper clips, a tape dispenser or other common office supplies. There will be no more lessons using moldy wheat rolls and a half deck of Elvis playing cards from Vegas. (I kid you. I already mentioned in the last post that those wheat roll are staying a little longer for a purpose. Curious, eh?)

To soften the blow, though, I'm going to go with one reader's suggestion (burning4eternity) and have a giveaway. What a great idea. It will bring joy to my overcrowded heart to know that these valuable objects are going to good homes.

Just select an item from the previous post and comment on how it might be used to teach YOUR children (or spouse or dog or roommate or grocer) a lesson for life.

Example: the deflated mylar balloon reminds me that many things in life are temporary. We need to celebrate and find joy in every opportunity. Or the birthday balloon could just remind you how old and decrepit you're getting.

You never know. YOU could be the winner of a giant latex apron or a power drill. I'll probably construct a giant wooden wheel to spin and place all of your names on it. Even if you have a lousy comment that you don't think is as clever as everyone else's, the wheel could still pick you!

After spinning it and determining the winner, the big wheel will sit in the corner of my office for the next three years until the next big purge.

(O.K. for those of you who are lazy like me, here's the list so you don't have to go to all the effort of clicking that mouse to read the items from the previous post, but you will have to squint to read it: Scarecrows and other decorations from our church's pumpkin patch, A giant bottle of vinegar, two briefcases with combinations that no one knows, a box of rubber gloves, junk mail from 2003, a tin of wheat rolls from Christmas, a pirate treasure chest or two, two basketballs, a microphone stand, 12 basketball uniforms, 5 sample carpet squares, 10 bamboo sticks about 5 feet long, a guitar I haven't played for 2 years, a pirate costume, 2 giant latex aprons from a science lab, a large tupperware cake box, a collapsible soccer goal, a power drill, a deflated mylar birthday balloon from last year)


Emily said...

The pirate costume is scary, yet somehow appealing.

I don't want it though, just wanted to voice my pick.

Your guitar shouldn't make the list ya know. I think your wife might not appreciate that one.

Mr. E said...

The scarecrows are intriguing to my wife. She wants to put it in our front yard at Halloween with a sign that says, "Ain't no ghost here, but the Holy Ghost!" I guess it would be used to remind our kids, and others that there is at least one real "Ghost" out there, but it is not scary at all.

Anonymous said...

What a great idea! Hope you have lots of takers.

burning4eternity said...

Hey Scott,

Thanks for taking me up on my idea, to be clear however, I am not wanting any of the "treasure" :)

Thanks also for the link, and your kind comment on my blog. I have since written another piece and kindly ask for your thoughts and prayer.


Tina in Thailand said...

Hmmm the basketball uniforms could be a lesson on the body of Christ, how all members are important and necessary, even the short kids who can't throw or run.
The treasure chests, of course, all the riches we have in Christ, the scarecrow could be lit on fire and show how temporary our works done in our strength for our own motives are, you know the chaff and all that stuff, but the church would probably frown on open flame in Sunday School. That would be have to be a 'Family Fun Night' lesson. :)
I admit I am having a hard time with the latex gloves. Love to hear your object lesson with those!

Tina in Thailand said...

oops just reread your post and it was not latex GLOVES, but APRONS!
(how embarassing)
That could be some kind of modern armor, right?

javamamma said...

I could seriously use those bamboo sticks for decorating in my house. I'm not sure of any lesson, usually those come to me while blow drying my hair or laying in a tanning bed.

rachel said...

The power drill - make a joke about going to the dentist for some tooth work and getting worried because your dentist had a Black & Decker out. Then you could talk when someone gets his teeth drilled at the dentist, it's quite painful. But afterward, his teeth are better off. If he hadn't gone to the dentist in the first place, his teeth might have rotted out and been far worse off than actually going to the dentist and getting them taken care of. I think you can see where this one's going... When we ask God to remove sin from our lives, it can be a difficult process, but afterwards, we're much better off.

JustAnotherBlogger said...

Ooh, ooh, ooh! Can I have the guitar? (only if it won't upset your wife!)

While playing through a few worship songs at our small group on Friday, my son was begging me to let him play my guitar. If only he had a guitar of his own...

Oh, and the 2003 junk mail would enable me to refine the kids' paper shredding skills--definitely useful for keeping the home/office clutter free!

And finally, a basketball could go a long way in showing my East Coast, soccer-loving kids what it means to be a Hoosier.

Heck, we'll even drive down to pick 'em up (I know EEEEMommy would love to see Cindy again)!

HootenLetthedogsout said...

I could really use the carpet squares. We are having a hard time teaching Nana and Angel to LIFT their big, floppy bassett hound ears when drinking from their water bowls! I am getting the soles of 10-12 pairs of socks soaked per day! Perhaps I could train them to drink from a squeeze bottle?