If your children don't want to come over to our house and play with our children, I'll understand.
Really. It's all right.
It can be a traumatic experience for some kids, I know.
That dead hamster that's been chilling in our garage freezer? I just found out this morning that a couple of friends have taken it out of the freezer and out of the plastic bags to hold it! I'm just horrified, so Pepper is leaving pronto.
But even with the carcasses removed from our food storage units, there's still the matter of the animal bones strewn across the property.
Visitors are first greeted by a pile of bones on the sidewalk. How quaint.
The gigantic leg bone by the grill on the deck is also homey and welcoming.
And of course, there's a skull in an old mailbox on the back porch.Presumably, these bones are from various animals like deer in the woods. Or perhaps some old cow bones from the farm that predated this neighborhood. But to add drama to the affair, the girls found an old wallet near some remains. We're fairly certain the bones were deer bones, but it's weird that an animal would be carrying a wallet. Hmmm. That gave them a mystery to work on for a while.
But don't worry; we've already nixed the animal-head collection that the girls had begun. It consisted of a bird head and a chipmunk head (thanks to the neighborhood cats).
Pretty much what I'm saying is that when my girls finally make the news on a Dateline criminal special, the quotes from neighbors will be, "We should have guessed something was up with those girls, what with all the bones and body parts all over the place."