"The Muffled Cries For Help From a Daddy of Four Beautiful Little Girls"

Wednesday, February 24, 2010

Swabbing The Poop Deck

In the arctic regions of Indiana where we live, we've had a fair amount of snow.

And while I've done a decent amount of shoveling snow to clear a place for our dog Cheddar to do his business, he evidently hasn't realized that underneath several inches of snow is our deck, not the yard. So he's simply stepped out onto our deck and peed right then and there. (Once he even left one leg inside in the kitchen and leaned out to urinate. Good grief.)

Then I'd watch him run down the steps to go do #2 on the grass I cleared.

However, as the snow on the deck has melted we've learned that the entire deck was littered with tootsie rolls, for lack of a better term.

I'm guessing I'll need to shovel the entire deck next time it snows. And I guess right now too.

You probably didn't care to know about any of that, right?

Tuesday, February 23, 2010

Forgive Me, Readers, For I Have Sinned

I’m not even going to look at my previous post to see how long ago it was.

It’s possible that some of you have thought I’d moved, died, been kidnapped, abducted by aliens, elected to congress or other such horrifying scenario.

The fact of the matter is this:
I hadn’t been able to get my Blackberry to work right on the post-writing page. Today, I finally modified some settings and it’s working again. I can’t say I know what I did other than check some boxes and uncheck some other ones, but the good news is that I can post again from my Blackberry.

I know what you’re thinking. “Doesn’t this guy have access to a computer? Couldn’t he have posted even withOUT a cell phone?”

You would THINK so. But please take into consideration the fact that I have 4 daughters and a wife. So having a desktop computer and two laptops is still three computers too few for me to have much access, much less the quality and quantity of access necessary to write the caliber of blog posts to which you have become accustomed.

To catch you up on our lives, I’m just going to summarily list things from our lives. And then starting with my next post, we'll just go on like we were never apart at all.

* I’m letting my hair grow out. (By “grow out,” I mean that I haven’t shaved my head since last week. It’s winter and longer hair is less likely to retain lint and fuzz from my stocking caps.)

*Three of my daughters just found out yesterday that they made the cuts for the elementary school talent/variety show. I’ll post pictures of their Tootsie Roll costumes later in the week.

* My other daughter is coming out of her shy-shell more and more; last night I dropped her off at an FCA event at a home and she walked all the way up the driveway by herself. No friend. No me. ALL. BY. HERSELF. If you know her, this is indeed a milestone.

* Speaking of milestones, my wife has discovered that I’m not actually turning 40 next month. It’s next YEAR. So if she’d invited you to my surprise 40th party, it’s postponed until at least within 11 months of my actual 40th birthday.

* Cheddar the cheese-loving helldog has only chewed up one antique piece of furniture in recent months, so we’re feeling really good about his maturing process.

* On a related note, we’ve reinstituted the shock collar with the remote control button.

* And finally, we only have two more Christmas decorations left to put away, but as long as we don’t actually turn on the lights on the Christmas topiaries flanking our front door, they look pretty normal…other than the fact that one is leaning at 45-degree angle.
But hey, that’s how we roll. Deal with it.